...where are you?

In my effort to maintain some form of masculinity(i have some, well, so I've been told), i posed a question to myself, sitting surrounded by many, but conveniently alone...

"Where are you?"

I struggled to maintain my composure, as an unnatural smile crept across my daydreaming face. Some faces smiled back, others, wore a look of concern, but i didn't care, I was painting a star filled someday.

Together.
Late night talks.
Popcorn fights.
Falling asleep together on the couch.
Taking walks.
Cooking breakfast.
Playing tricks.
Holding hands.

Is it possible to maintain a love? To be just as interested in a someone as you were when you first met? When infatuation and obsession phase comes to an end, what then?

Never fall out of love.

Keep.

On.

Falling.

I asked, and she said yes.

White dress.
Smiles.
Cumberbuns.
Chocolate fountian.
Europe.

One of my dreams, is buying a house as beat up as we are, and turning it into our home. Putting our years together and making something beautiful. Somewhere we can both escape and be alone.

Two tone paint and trim.
Brick walls and wood floors.
Track lights and picture frames.
Antique furniture and brushed nickel.
Matching flatware.
Fireplace.
Working in the yard.

On our day off, sometime we are content to do nothing. Let's just stay home and get some Chinese.

Looking at clouds.
Getting delivery, we went out last night.
Folding each others laundry.
Laughing our guts out.
Taking baths together.(Purely for water conservation of course.)
Secret handshakes.

Will it be perfect? No...but yes. Sometimes it's gonna rain, the key is, to both stay under the umbrella. Sometimes we will disagree, and sometimes we will be REALLY annoyed with each other. Therein lies the beauty. Learning about one another, and digging deeper than just us.

Flowers.
I'm sorry cards.
Chocolates.
Hugs and kisses.
Make up...se...well, you know.
Forgetting.

What adventures we will have. Exploring this big, beautiful world together. Taking our lives on the road, in the air, or under the sea.

Writing postcards.
Hotels.
Taking LOTS of pictures.
Road trips.
Tents.
Sandy beaches.

I want to fight over the silly little things. The everyday choices, and the meaningless nothings.(She will almost always get her way.)

Cool Ranch or Nacho Cheese?
The Notebook or Saving Private Ryan?
1% or 2%?
Sushi or Italian?
Tide or Era?
Cheesecake or ice cream?

Sometimes, we don't even need to say anything. All it will take is a look into their eyes, or a nod of your head.

Reading books.
Playing guitar.
Laying in the hammock.
Being barefoot.
Dreaming.

To have a beautiful, caring wife to help raise our children. Hopefully they inherit her looks, all they should inherit from me, is a last name.

Late night diaper runs.
First steps.
Monsters under the bed.
Soccer games.
Dance class.
Disneyland.

Having grandkids, and spoiling them rotten. Growing old, but together. Kissing her wrinkles as she straightens my glasses.

Dentures.
Cruises.
Bingo.
Prune Juice.
Diapers.(Again.)

When the time comes to say goodbye, how could i leave her side? How can she leave mine. We leave knowing that one day, we will be together again. When that day comes, it will be like nothing had ever changed.

Where are you girl? It's getting late and i want to go home.


Miss you,

xoxo

Christopher Michael